Firstly, let me explain the title. Last night, Paul, Calum and I watched Ground Control, a (pardon my French here) fucking horrible film, in which Kiefer Sutherland has to guide a plane on to a runway, and the suspense of the film is created because it's a bit windy and the airport is going through budget cuts. Seriously. Even though he's only in it for five minutes, The Fonz is the highlight of the film, and also saves the day, because he pulls a giant bird out of a satellite dish. That's all it took to help the plane land. Pulling a bird off a dish. Also, the film's writers obviously couldn't decide whether Jack Bauer was going to pump the new air traffic controller woman or not, because the dialogue between two altered between patronisation, damsel in distress-ness, cheeky flirting, air traffic control facts and (not strictly dialogue, but worth a mention) Bauer doing his sad face, which looks like someone who's been told Santa, The Tooth Fairy, The Easter Bunny and Jesus don't exist at the same time, all while taking a massive dump.The writers must have been off their tits on horse tranquilisers or something to think this would be a successful film. I looked it up. It wasn't.
Sadly, I knew a lot of the cast from other things, Jack Bauer obviously playing as himself in 24, his mentor-slash-friend was in Collateral and Timecop, and the obligatory prickish air traffic controller who becomes nice at the end after Jack Bauer faces his fears and doesn't let another plane crash (oh aye, he got sacked after he couldn't stop a plane crashing before, but comes back because the airport can't afford anyone else) plays someone called Wilson in House. I haven't seen it, but I do recognise the guy. Also, the guy who did the voice of Roger Rabbit goes mental with a golf club.
Anyway, don't ever watch this film. It's so bad, you can't even take the piss, because it's just so poorly written, the one (can't tell if it's deliberately) funny part involves the Fonz's dumbass assistant, flicking switches like he's gone into a huff at not being allowed to watch Spongebob Squarepants.
So onto other things, and I'd like to take the time out to urge you all to watch 30 Rock, sad thing is I'm only aware of one person I know that watches it! I'm currently on Season 3, and trying to catch up before Season 5 starts in September, along with The Office, still among the best shows of all time.
Either way, I've also pretty much given up of that whole Collaboration thing, was quite clearly a massive fail, so I might just take it down soon, unless I get any last minute points.
Here's your checklist for the week:
Listen to In Case of Fire and Vampire Weekend (last-minute addition - 'cause they're beastin)
Watch 30 Rock (preferably from the start)
Don't watch Ground Control. EVER.
Darren out, saying me and my cousins and you and your cousins, it's a line that's always running...
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Now playing: Vampire Weekend - Cousins
via FoxyTunes
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